Being a “good” father is hard. In my opinion, it is the hardest job a man will ever have, and it is the hardest job to do well. The pressures of being a good father can be immense. Biblically, fathers are to be the primary breadwinner for the family. “But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel” (I Timothy 5:8). A father is the leader in the home. A wise man will certainly seek the opinion of others, especially his wife, but ultimately God will hold him responsible as the head of the home (Ephesians 5:23). When we men stand before God, he is not going to look at our wife first concerning our families, he will look at us. The importance of being a good father cannot be overstated. The future of our children and the future of our society is dependent upon it. Lawlessness, chaos, and disorder have become commonplace in our culture. I believe there are many factors that can be attributed to the decay. No fear of God which leads to no fear of authority is one. Ignorance or flat-out rejection of the bible as the foundation for our society is another. But the lack of fathers in the home or the lack of standing respect within the home for the fathers, ranks extremely high on the blame list. It has been only a few months ago, I heard on a podcast that over 80% of all criminals in the prison system are from single parent homes. That is staggering. If the families were held together by a biblical bond or even just a moral bond founded on the bible’s principles, that trend would change our nation for the better. Respect, honor, and discipline are some traits which bring blessings to any person. Those are some of the basic foundations of the Judeo-Christian mindset. The family functioning biblically is the basic fabric for success. How do I know that to be true? It was the set-up, the plan, that God first used in Eden, and no one has ever in thousands of years of human history been able to improve on it even though many have tried. In the past fifty plus years, I have witnessed fathers portrayed as fools, imbecilic, morons, and the stupidest people in the room on television sitcoms and movies. It is my firm belief that fathers are just as important as mothers. Their roles are different. Children need both a father and mother. These are complementary not contrarian.

To have God’s blessings is to have the favor of God and the protection of God in our life. “Blessed” is a bible word. It is a good word. What can a father do, as the leader of the family, to secure the blessings of God and the protection of God for his family? Let me give you some thoughts I had this morning.

  1. Point your family toward God. That means that God is always front and center in the daily schedule. Deuteronomy 6:4-15 is a special passage directed toward families. It is called the “Shema.” The Hebrews were to teach their children constantly; Day and night; Mealtimes; Normal family schedule. God was to be on their minds. God still should be on our minds.
  2. Personally, walk with God as an Example. Fathers are imperfect, but so are mothers and children. We find many fathers on the pages of the Bible that had flaws and failures. Some more than others. As a father, we ought to want to be a good example. Why? What we as fathers do in moderation, the children will do in excess. We can acknowledge our shortcomings and missteps, but the overall trajectory of our lives should have a bent to walking with the Lord as faithfully as we can.
  3. Point out the Strengths and Weaknesses. It is my belief that we should praise more than we criticize, but sometimes we must correct when the child is straying. The battery that starts your car has both a positive and a negative terminal. Each is needed for the starter to turn the engine. Ephesians 6:4 admonishes fathers. “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” In the business world, one of the best ways to motivate a workforce to produce more is to praise. I do not know who first said this, but I have loved the saying for decades now. “Find someone doing something right and brag on them.” That thinking should be in our homes. Build and affirm every day. Correct when needed but spend more time building the family instead of criticizing.
  4. Pass out Blessings Generously. We give little gifts of our time and our words. We make family a priority because there is coming a time when those little ones will not be little. They will be gone, living their own lives, and the training you sought to impart when they were small will have to be done differently when they are adults. Start early. Point them on a path of loving and serving God. Affirm to them that God has a plan and a purpose for their lives, and they should seek it. Bring people into your home that have the same desires for your home as you do. I read this story this week at Bible.org. “The great British preacher, Charles Haddon Spurgeon, tells of a time when he was ten years old when a traveling preacher stayed in Spurgeon’s grandfather’s parson­age. The man took time on three successive days to spend with this boy, telling him of Christ’s love and praying, with his arms around the boy’s neck, that he might know and serve the Lord. Then, one morning when the whole family was gathered for prayer, this preacher took ten-year-old Charles, sat him on his knee, and prophesied, “This child will one day preach the gospel, and he will preach it to great multitudes. I am persuaded that he will preach in the chapel of Rowland Hill, …” He called all present to witness what he had said and then gave Charles a coin as a reward if he would learn the hymn, ‘God moves in a mysterious way His wonders to perform.’ ” Years later, that prophecy was fulfilled. Spurgeon comments, “Did the words of Mr. Knill help to bring about their own fulfillment? I think so. I believed them and looked forward to the time when I should preach the Word” (C. H. Spurgeon Autobiography[The Banner of Truth Trust, 1:28]). The great Spurgeon was blessed by his father inviting a preacher into the home and blessed by the guest preacher personally. Spurgeon’s father wanted the best for his boy. I think he got his desire.