In our society, who is the adult in the home that is most likely to be considered non-essential? Now, I do not watch regular TV these days but from years ago the sitcoms always had “dad” as the useless, sometimes senile, stupid, and generally all-around bozo that nobody respected and barely loved. For the month of June, we will be taking on that popular notion and showing from the bible that fathers are a vital part in the lives of children. Beginning today, I hope to challenge our men to take on the role of fatherhood with a new vigor.
No one should be a better father to your kids than you! When God chose to share his nature and attributes to mankind how did he identify? He identified as a father. Over 1,100 times in the Bible the word father is used. “And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty” is God’s promise from II Corinthians 6:18. Why is it that God identified as a father? Both mother and father are extremely important in their value toward raising well-adjusted children. We have spent the month of May praising, challenging, and hearing from great mothers in the Bible so we understand that moms are a big deal. But dads are a big deal too. I think fathers bring different things to the family than the mother. What are some of those differences?
- Dads are a little more aggressive. Their touch is different. Kyle Pruett is an expert and author. He specializes in rearing children and the parent roles. He said, “by 8-weeks infants can tell the difference between mother and father interaction.” Fathers are a little rougher, which an energetic child enjoys at certain times but if the child is sleepy or hurting they usually hold out their arms for mom. As they grow they want someone to wrestle with on the floor. The dad is usually the wrestler, tossing the child into the air while mother says do not throw too high. Fathers are more aggressive in most instances than mothers. I think this teaches children to strive beyond their comfort zones. Who is it at the T-ball game that is screaming the loudest to “swing harder”, “put a flat spot on that ball”, “hit it and run like the wind?” Most often the loudmouth is dad and sometimes even papas get in on the action. (My wife must pull me off the ledge every so often).
- Dads speak a little bit differently. Generally speaking, not every circumstance, mothers usually speak to the babies and toddlers in their limited language. Fathers try but with limited success compared to mom. Larger and unknown words are used more often when the father is speaking to a child. This is beneficial in the development of knowledge and vocabulary. There is also a difference in tone. A father’s voice may strike fear in the heart of a disobedient child in a way that a mother’s voice does not. The older the child gets the more this is likely to happen, which brings me to the last thought.
- Dads bring a discipline that is needed. The older a boy gets the more he needs a father in the home! There comes a time when physically a mother cannot handle a teenage boy which means she cannot control him. If a father is not in the home this often means trouble for the family and sometimes trouble for society. “Seventy percent of teenage births, dropouts, suicides, runaways, juvenile delinquents, and child murderers involve children raised by single mothers” (Ann Coulter). Well over 75% of all the men incarcerated in the prisons of America come from homes where a single mother could not control her son. Fathers are physically more able to confront and subdue the adolescent, giving him the boundaries that are needed for a well-adjusted citizen equipped for living in society with success. There is another benefit to fathers discipline in the home. The personal lives of girls are enhanced as well. The little girl with a father figure to admire is more secure and confident. In many instances this security produces the fruit of delayed sexual activity in the life of the girl. If a father is not around, this activity happens earlier which can result in STD’s and/or pregnancies. The number one indicator of poverty in a family is a single, unmarried mother. A godly man is essential for a well-rounded, functioning family. Do not buy Hollywood’s adaptation of fathers being idiots, imbeciles, and all-around losers. God chose to be identified as a father for a reason. Dedicated Christian fathers are important in every sense you can imagine.